Why now?

Well, like I mentioned previously, we've talked about adoption for several years now. Honestly, there was a time in my life when I wasn't interested in adoption for our family, but through the years God has really opened my eyes to the beauty of it.

All of our conversations about it, though, left us feeling completely overwhelmed. With so much need, how in the world do you know where to start? Domestic or international? If international, what country? How do you find an agency? How do you pay for it? We would usually come to the conclusion that if God wanted us to adopt, He could just place a child on our doorstep or have us cross paths with a woman considering an abortion or needing a family to adopt her baby. And He could do that. In fact, you never know if someday He doesn't do just that for us or for someone else!

A few weeks ago, some girlfriends and I went to see a movie and grab some yummy Starbucks for a Girls Night Out. I sat there explaining this very thing to them..."we feel led to it, but just don't know where or when or how...He'll just have to make it happen!" When I got home that night, Hubby was sound asleep and I couldn't sleep at all. (Thank you, decaf coffee!) So I went downstairs and got on Facebook (aka the biggest time eater of all time!) Well, this was also just after the Haiti earthquake. A friend of mine on Facebook had a status update that said something along the lines of "50 Haitian orphans will be in a city about an hour away by the end of the week and they need temporary and/or permanent homes. If you're able to help, contact me." Ohmygoodness, I couldn't sleep. Was this God placing an orphan on our doorstep???

I talked with Hubby early that next morning and we both agreed that we at least needed to look into it. So I made a few phone calls and essentially found that it was a dead end. There weren't going to be orphans coming after all.

Within a few days, though, we realized how disappointed we were. We really got ourselves excited thinking that an adoption really might happen! So at that point, we began investigating adoption more seriously. We sent off for and read cover to cover some information packets from adoption agencies. We sat through a webinar. We read ministry pamphlets about adoption. We talked with other adoptive families. Adoption was still very much on our hearts, yet we still did not feel called anywhere. We were back at the beginning and were quite discouraged.

Shortly thereafter, though, my church was having a girls get together. I wasn't sure I wanted to go because it had been one of those weeks where it seemed like we were hardly home. Hubby really encouraged me to go, though, and boy am I glad I did! While I was there I heard a friend talking about an adoption seminar at an agency I'd never heard of. She and her husband were going to go that very next night! She encouraged us to come along!

Well, that particular session was booked so we couldn't go, but I talked to her that night after she returned home. She told me about a particular country's adoption program - one that all the agencies I had looked at never mentioned. She shared some pictues of orphans and talked about the extreme need in that country.

It was practically immediate. Hubby and I both were in love. We just felt a calling to a certain place like we'd never felt before. Not that there's not need in other places; there certainly is! We just had never felt a pull in a specific direction before.

We couldn't sleep. Well, okay...I couldn't sleep. Hubby can fall asleep standing up. (Maybe not really, but close!) I stayed up for hours that first night researching online and reading blogs of other families who were adopting from this same place.

I found this picture and just couldn't get it out of my mind. It haunted me.

For days on end, we couldn't focus on our normal daily tasks. We were consumed and we felt giddy. It really felt like we were falling in love! That's the only thing I have to compare it to!

Because feelings can be misleading and because we wanted to be certain that this was God's idea and not ours, we've spent lots of time in prayer and discussion about whether or not this is right for our family. Without a doubt, we feel like this is where God is leading us. We are simply choosing to follow Him.

So that answers the why now question. Next up....where!?!? (Do I have you curious???)